Man Snatching ....??

This is a subject that will continue to amaze me. It always makes me cringe when I hear a fellow woman say “Akpena snatched my man” and then she goes to describe how she is going to kill Akpena bla bla bla. How many Akpenas you wan kill sef...enh?!!

Ndi uwa, please explain to me how a man gets snatched when he is not a handbag, a mobile phone, a pet dog, a baby, food, car, bicycle etc. Note that all things snatch-able both living and non-living things, are taken without consent. Sister, this means that your man was not snatched hence he yielded to temptation that he will still yield to again just before he leaves Akpena for Ovularia. On the other hand, if he was actually snatched, then you should really call the police because he might be in serious danger. Snatched is used here according to the dictionary meaning ;To grasp or seize hastily, eagerly, or suddenly.

I am of the school of thought that if I as a woman can keep it on lock, there is absolutely no reason on God’s earth why you as a man cannot do exactly the same. There is nothing extra in a man’s body that makes him more susceptible to the devil’s temptation more than a woman. As they say “na devil...”.  I have heard women say “He is a man, all men cheat” and they are okay with it because men have four heads and one bob-marley and we women don’t....mchewwww. Yet you see these same people checking their guy’s mobile phones, emails etc. If you are okay with it, why are you stressing? Why are you fighting every girl who you suspect he is cheating with or every girl who you “think” is more his type that you are. Please is this not bondage???? How long can you keep this up??? How many girls’ houses will you storm with your gang of friends accusing and assaulting simply because you found her number on his phone.

For example, I know someone who daily showers curses, sickness, failures and misfortune on every woman her man might be sleeping with out there. She prays this every night on her knees. One day I had to suggest she prayed for her guy instead...needless to say, that is the last time I ever gave prayer/relationship advice EVER!!!! I was almost eaten alive....hian!!! How can so many people who don’t know each other be at fault when it only really concerns one person? If we do not recognise the source of the problem and accept it, how do you begin to solve it or in some cases free ourselves?

Please don’t get me wrong, of course there are girls out there who go out of their way to seduce single, married, spoken for, engaged and even gay men. The truth is that they will ALWAYS be out there just like the devil will always be there to tempt you to put that lip-gloss on the shop shelf in your hand bag and pretend it just fell in there. Just because the temptation is there does not mean we should fall or is this a measure of strength. I consider myself a very strong person but it is not my strength that helps me resist temptations, it is the immeasurable love of the things that yielding to that temptation could cost me. For example, I am a praying wife and mother and I know what I am holding onto God to do for my family and our generations to come, that is the reason I will not nick that lip-gloss from the shop shelf; the same reason why I will go back to the shop attendant and return the excess change I was given (besides, those coins will not change your life); the same reason why I refuse to envy others or salivate over their fortune because my own will always be the sweetest. So the way I see it, is that it takes more than strength to resist temptation, it takes the fear of God, love, responsibility, prioritising, self-esteem, respect and values.

A long time ago, I stopped consoling friends who came looking for my shoulder to cry on when their common boy friend had just cheated with the third, fourth, fifth friend......as in......!!!!! It was not just about relationships but just coming back with the same avoidable problem again and again and again.  Is this not the same thing as placing your hand in fire again and again and each time crying ouch! BUT WHY?!!! I am sure this is why I was putting on so much weight at a time because I always felt so drained and hypoglycemic that I had to swallow some serious pounded yam after they got off the phone...talk about exhausting.  

Let us not let delusion rule our lives, your man/ woman was not snatched, they knew what they were doing and they chose to ignore every voice that was screaming reason in their heads.

Of course it doesn’t always mean it is the end of the relationship...not at all. This only means that if you choose to carry on with this person, first of you have to acknowledge that they are the one with the issue not the devil out there. Your partner who I am assuming has realised his/her mistake and wants to remain in this relationship has to thoroughly deal with their issues in super details so that it does not happen again. So there is no need to go fighting in the streets sharing stuff with the whole world, the issue is at the roots.  In matters like this your main ingredient is God because it takes a lot of strength to get back to how it all used to be i.e. if you are that forgiving woman/man ooo because we all very very different...lol!!